The Grief Works Companion
Living with loss, one week at a time
Next Wednesday the nights overtake the days, and on 25 October the clocks go back. For anyone grieving a partner, the hours after dark are often the hardest. Why, and how to plan evenings that hold you through the autumn.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
A breakup or divorce can bring every feeling of grief, with one painful twist: the person is still alive and carrying on without you. Why it hurts so much, why staying in touch keeps the wound open, and the one thing I suggest.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 5 min read
Registering the death, Tell Us Once, who to contact, joint accounts and probate, in the order you'll actually need them, with room to go at your own pace.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
The first weeks are about getting through, not coping well. What's happening to you, why the tears come out of nowhere, and the small, practical things that genuinely help.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
Friends see you back at work and think you're through the worst. Julia Samuel's iceberg of grief explains why they're only seeing a third of it, and what to say when they ask.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
Why decisions feel so frightening now, the "no big decisions in the first year" advice and when to break it, and a step-by-step way to decide without the person you always talked things through with.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
Two partners can lose the same person and grieve in completely different ways. Why that can drive a wedge between you, and the one thing that helps couples stay close through loss.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
When getting out of bed feels pointless, you may be caught in what Julia Samuel calls the futility cycle. Why it happens, why it can arrive months later, and a simple way to break it this week.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
Why the build-up is often worse than the day, how to plan for it, simple rituals that keep them close, and permission to do the day differently.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 7 min read
Why grief wrecks sleep, what to do about the empty side of the bed, and a step-by-step plan for the 3am wake-ups.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
When your partner dies and the relationship was complicated, the chance to put things right goes with them. Why regret and guilt hurt so much, and how to work with them rather than trying to tidy them away.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
Panic, sleeplessness, brain fog, no appetite, an ache in your chest. Here's why grief is so physical, what's normal, and what actually helps.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 8 min read
What Bereavement Support Payment is, who can get it and the deadline that matters, plus the Council Tax change, pensions and where to get free advice.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 5 min read
Fear, fury, jealousy and numbness, often all at once. Why grief can turn you into a version of yourself you don't know, and the simple practice of naming what you feel.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
Why so many people feel nothing at first, how long shock-numbness usually lasts, what often happens when it lifts, and when numbness is a sign you need more support.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
What the law gives you, how to talk to your manager, what to say to colleagues, and how to get through the first weeks back without pretending you're fine.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
Putting grief in a box might work for a while. Why pushed-down grief tends to return with the next loss, what it can do to your body and mind, and how to let it through a little at a time.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
There's no deadline, and the "five stages" won't tell you where you are. What the research actually shows, why grief can feel harder later on, and how to tell if yours has become stuck.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 7 min read
Word-for-word messages for turning down invitations, telling friends what helps, answering "you're so strong", and reaching back out when people have gone silent.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
Building a new life after your partner dies can feel like a betrayal. Why that guilt comes, what the "new normal" really means, and how to build your life around the loss rather than away from it.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min read
Free UK helplines, how to get bereavement counselling on the NHS or through charities, peer groups for widows and widowers, and what to do when friends disappear.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 7 min read
Why the days feel so empty after a partner dies, why a little structure helps your nervous system, and a simple way to build a day you can actually get through.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 5 min read
When your husband, wife, partner or parent has dementia or a terminal illness, you can grieve them long before they die. Why this living loss is so painful, why you may feel angry or even want it to be over, and the conversations that help.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 5 min read
A sudden death brings shock and trauma. A long illness brings exhaustion, relief and guilt. Neither is easier, and knowing which layer you're carrying can help you find the right support.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 7 min read
Why staying connected to the person who died helps rather than holds you back, simple rituals and touchstones to try, and how to start writing to them.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 6 min read
What to say, whether they should come to the funeral, how children and teenagers grieve at different ages, and how to parent when you're grieving too.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 7 min read
There's no deadline on a wardrobe. How to know when you're ready, a step-by-step way to go through their things, and what to do when other people push you to clear it all.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 5 min read
A simple structure, questions to get you started, how long it should be, readings and poems people often choose, and what to do if you can't face reading it yourself.
Nick Begley reviewed by Julia Samuel MBE
· 5 min read
When someone dies, the world doesn't stop. Bills still need paying. Meals still need making. Life keeps demanding things from you, even when you can barely remember what day it is. If you're struggling to get through basic tasks, or finding yourself paralysed by the simplest decisions, you're not alone. One of the most practical things you can do right now is build a simple structure — not to fill every moment, but to hold you steady when everything else feels like it's falling apart.
Team Grief Works
· 5 min read
One of the deepest fears in grief is that you'll lose them twice — first to death, and then to forgetting. That their voice will fade. That you'll move so far into your new life that they'll be left behind. But here's what grief research now tells us: death ends a life, but it doesn't end your relationship. You can learn to love them in absence, not just in presence. And that connection can bring comfort, not only pain.
Team Grief Works
· 6 min read
You're sleeping more than ever, but you wake up exhausted. Simple tasks feel monumental. You forget words mid-sentence, lose your keys constantly, stand in rooms wondering why you walked in. People tell you to rest, but rest doesn't seem to help. If this sounds familiar, please know: this isn't weakness. This is grief — and there's a reason it's so physically draining.
Team Grief Works
· 5 min read
There's something about the turn of a new year that makes grief feel sharper. Everywhere you look, people are talking about fresh starts, new beginnings, resolutions. But when you're grieving, the idea of moving forward into another year without them can feel less like hope and more like leaving them behind.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
It feels almost wrong to ask. You'd never wish for the loss. And yet, somewhere along the way, you might notice something shifting. What used to matter doesn't anymore. What you took for granted feels precious now. You might even discover you're stronger than you ever imagined.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 3 min video
Anniversaries and milestone days can intensify grief, reminding us of our loved one and past celebrations. It’s important to acknowledge these moments and create a meaningful ritual to remember them, whether it’s lighting a candle, sharing a memory, or gathering with loved ones.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 2 min video
As the holiday season approaches — parties, gatherings, festive decorations appearing everywhere — many people find themselves facing something that feels almost unspeakable: the profound disconnect between watching everyone else celebrate while carrying the weight of loss. If that's you this year, you're not alone.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
Grief often pulls us in two directions. There's the need to feel the pain of the loss and process what has happened. And there's the need to restore and keep living life — working, connecting, caring for ourselves. Finding the balance between these two is where healing happens.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
Grief is deeply personal, but there is a process. Not a tidy one, not a straight line, but a natural movement between feeling the pain and giving yourself a break from it. Both are necessary. Both help you heal.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 3 min video
Grief is universal, but it is also intensely personal. It's contradictory, chaotic, and unpredictable. It often feels like fear — because death shatters our sense of control and trust in the predictability of life. If you're struggling to understand what's happening to you, or if someone in your life is struggling to understand what you're going through, this may help.
Team Grief Works
· 6 min read
There's a particular kind of exhaustion that comes with grieving while life keeps making demands. Invitations arrive. Favours get asked. People need things from you. The pressure to show up, say yes, and keep going builds — even though simply getting through each day still feels like an enormous achievement.
Team Grief Works
· 3 min read
There's a strange paradox at the heart of grief. You need people. You know this somewhere in your bones. And yet — the thought of reaching out, of explaining how you feel, of being around others who seem to be living normally... it can feel like too much. So you pull back. You cancel plans. You let calls go to voicemail. And slowly, without meaning to, you find yourself more alone than ever.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
Losing someone to suicide brings a particular kind of pain. The what ifs. The guilt. The quiet, unbearable question: could I have stopped this if I'd loved them better, called them sooner, done something differently?
Julia Samuel MBE
· 2 min video
When people ask Julia "how long am I going to feel this bad?" — her answer might surprise you.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 2 min video
When a pregnancy ends, people often expect your grief to match the number of weeks. But that's not how it works. You weren't grieving a number of cells. You were grieving the future you'd already started to imagine: the pram, the car seat, the family you were becoming.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min video
It feels almost wrong to ask. Can anything good come from losing someone you love? You'd never wish for the pain. And yet, somewhere along the way, something in you might start to shift.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min video
One of the hardest parts of grief isn't just what we feel ourselves. It's knowing what to say to others. How do you explain death to a child without scaring them? What do you say to a friend who's lost someone, when you're terrified of making it worse?
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min video
"I don't have time to grieve right now." It's something many of us tell ourselves. But as Julia explains, grief doesn't disappear when we ignore it — it waits.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 2 min video
Grief is invisible. On the outside, life carries on. But inside, you might feel like you're falling apart. Your memory is gone. Your body aches. You're furious at people you love, numb to things you used to care about, and convinced you're failing because you can't just tidy up your feelings and move on.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 4 min video
When people don't understand your grief, it can feel deeply lonely — like life is carrying on without you. Those who love you may want to help, but can't quite reach you. If that's you today, you're not alone. Here, we offer gentle guidance on coming home to yourself, finding your people, and putting your grief into words.
Team Grief Works
· 5 min read
There's something nobody quite prepares you for about grief — the way it takes up residence not just in your heart, but in your entire body. Perhaps you've felt it: that heaviness in your chest when you wake, the fog that descends when you're trying to remember simple things, or the exhaustion that runs deeper than tiredness. Here, we explore what's happening in your mind and body, and offer gentle ways to support yourself through it.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
When you're in the middle of grief, it can feel like the pain will never lift. Like you'll be stuck here forever. In this video, Julia explains why that feeling is normal, why guilt is grief's most painful companion, and how small things like structure, community and keeping your timeframes short can help you get through one day at a time.
Julia Samuel MBE
· 7 min video
One of the most common fears in grief is the worry that we might forget them. Perhaps you've noticed their voice becoming less distinct, or felt guilt after catching yourself laughing. These moments can feel like a betrayal — but they're actually a normal part of how grief works. Here, we explore why you won't forget them and how to stay connected through love.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
When we experience the loss of a loved one, a whirlwind of emotions envelops us. Family members and friends find themselves asking a poignant question: does grief ever truly go away? In this journey of the grieving process, understanding our emotions and the stages of grief is vital for mental health. Whether it's dealing with prolonged grief disorder, finding solace in support groups, or learning to live after losing a loved one, our path through grief is deeply personal.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
Grief, a natural response to loss, is a profound experience that many people face at some point in their lives, particularly after the death of a loved one. Confronting grief is essential for healing, but the process can vary greatly among individuals. This blog delves into the ways one can actively cope with grief and loss, providing insights for those who have lost a loved one and are seeking ways to navigate their major life change.
Team Grief Works
· 3 min read
Grief, a natural response to loss, is a profound experience that many people face at some point in their lives, particularly after the death of a loved one. Confronting grief is essential for healing, but the process can vary greatly among individuals. This blog delves into the ways one can actively cope with grief and loss, providing insights for those who have lost a loved one and are seeking ways to navigate their major life change.
Team Grief Works
· 3 min read
When we confront the death of a loved one, a tumultuous wave of emotions floods our lives. Understanding grief and the grieving process is a crucial step towards healing. For many, seeking support through therapy can be a transformative journey. In this blog, we'll explore the experiences of grief and how various types of therapy, including talking therapy, CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), and family therapy, can assist in navigating this challenging time.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
Grief, an intensely personal and natural response to loss, is a journey that many of us will navigate at some point in our lives. Whether it's the death of a loved one, loss of a job, or any significant life change, the grieving process can be a difficult time filled with a myriad of emotions. Understanding healthy ways to cope with grief is crucial in not only honoring the person who died or what was lost but also in nurturing our own mental well-being.
Team Grief Works
· 5 min read
Grief is an unpredictable journey, often described as a roller coaster of emotions. While many people experience an initial outpouring of support from friends and family in the early days, the intensity of grief can paradoxically feel more challenging as time progresses. This shift can be perplexing and isolating, leaving many to wonder why grief seems to get harder, not easier, with the passage of time.
Team Grief Works
· 4 min read
